Once when I met Grandmother Ayahuasca, She told me that it was beneficial to move away from casual sex, something I’d heard a few times. I had a spiritual psychologist come to my house to help with a ghost problem. She was Catholic, but she said, similar to the Buddhist message – there is no sin, there is only what helps you and what hinders you. Casual sex was undesirable (so to speak) because you’re inviting people you don’t necessarily know very well into your home, and into your embrace. The wisdom floating around is that there is an exchange of energies when you make love. My friend Gela @geliquasjourney likes to say “Don’t have sex with someone you wouldn’t want to be.” The more popular expression is, “Never lay down with a woman who has more problems than you do.”
After Ayahuasca told me, I took the advice to heart, at least for a little while. I started to change some habits, and became more selective about my partners, looking for a long-term relationship. Unfortunately, old habits die hard, and I ended up causing suffering for myself and others.
Natural consequences
My thinking during my period of restraint was, what if I accidentally conceive a child with this woman. With certain partners, at certain times, I felt comfortable that I would be able to raise a child. But I wasn’t thorough; I never asked how she felt about having children, if she was ready, and a situation like that might lead to an abortion, or me trying to persuade her to keep the child, or to her having the child but resenting it – a whole host of problems which I or my partner wouldn’t be ready to handle. In these times it can be easy to treat intercourse as a recreational activity, but in certain cases it can quickly lead to a question between life and death, or a question between a life with limited potential and great potential.
The power of seed
My friend Link told me years ago about semen retention, as a result of his research into eastern medicine, and tangentially to his yoga practice. On a related note, you might have heard of young men on the Internet renouncing porn and masturbation, not from a place of puritanism or self-denial, but of pragmatism, self-control and quality of life. In the traditional view of eastern medicine, a man has an amount of temporary energy, which is restored through rest and sustenance, and an amount of permanent energy, which, one spent, can never be restored. Link said to me once, a simple case for the practice is, sperm has the power to create life, a clear hint that it is powerful, and should not be wasted.
Prepare to enter
In certain traditions, before a man engages in intercourse, he removes all the hair from his body. I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who follows this practice, but now I can understand the reasoning behind it. Knowing that he has to prepare himself in this laborious way, he won’t take it on a whim, and he has plenty of time to think about whether it’s really the right thing, and thus it enables him to show respect for the process, just as one prepares oneself to enter a temple.
Welcome to Earth
A few weeks ago, I had a vision during meditation. I was making love to a woman I cared about. When I ejaculated, there was a burst of rainbow energy – something I’m told can happen at the moment of conception. Immediately, I leant down and started speaking to the child we had just given life. “I love you; know that you are loved in this world and that comes without conditions or expectations. Be whatever you need to be; you are welcomed into this world. You are loved.” The vision concluded with these three words: clarity, intention, and purpose, three key elements for a wonderful welcome to Earth.
